Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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