you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
