how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
