i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
The best revenge is premature balding
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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