Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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