we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
farters have to be the big spoon...
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
