Kareoke will never be a sober sport
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Also, beer. Big fan.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
