I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
