Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
