yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I just had sex on a roof
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize