There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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