I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
It's never too late to be topless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize