Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
