yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Randomize
