My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
