I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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