We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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