marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
We left the knife in your bed.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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