We won't sleep together?
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
