Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
