I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
