I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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