I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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