it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
