I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Randomize
