marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
