Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize