He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I'm like, not good at living.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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