I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize