I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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