You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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