As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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