It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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