Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize
