she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
