just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Randomize
