Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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