South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Randomize
