its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
