New invention idea: vibrating tampons
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
