I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
