So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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