Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
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