69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Need sex. Gaining weight.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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