Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
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