haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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