Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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