i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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