I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
