two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
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