whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
time to smoke my breakfast
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
