yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
My vagina just recognized that song.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
