I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
You were trust falling into bushes
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
