just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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